Billie Eilish Says She Once 'Regretted Every Decision' About Her Career

Billie Eilish has never been shy when it comes to opening up about hard topics. Whether it's mental illness, body image, or self-confidence, she has spoken candidly and honestly about subjects many would shy away from.

In a new interview with BritishGQ, the 18-year-old talked more about the impact of fame on not only her own self but how it impacted her friendships, as well as opening up about that powerful and now infamous short-film about body image

“I definitely didn’t want it to come off as, ‘Oh, now I am 18 now I like my body.’ I still have huge issues with my own body.” she told the publication about the video. “Sometimes I feel trapped by this persona that I have created, because sometimes I think people view me not as a woman. That tour video was about all that. It is me saying: look, there is a body underneath these clothes and you don’t get to see it. Isn’t that a shame? But my body is mine and yours is yours.”

As a young singer, Eilish's world and friendships completely changed after “Ocean Eyes” was an overnight success. While many think her friends would stick by her side whether to brag about being friends with a famous person or having true support, that wasn't the case for her. 

“I lost all my friends because of it,” she said. “Touring, jealousy, misunderstanding: I think all of it. One day I had, like, 50 friends, the next I had two. I was so f***ing sad. It makes me want to cry even now … so many of my friends got so mad at me for not being available to hang with them or go outside.”

As many know, Eilish opened up about being suicidal a few years ago but in the new interview she revealed that February and March of last year was an even harder time for her than that. So much so that she ended up regretting her entire career.  

“At that precise moment I regretted every decision I ever made about getting into this whole game,” she said. “the crazy passion of the fans was there, but the architecture around tours, the checks for my mental health and the security wasn’t.”

You can read the whole interview here.

Photo: Getty Images

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